Curious Bob gets curious about blogging.

This blog hasn't been touched in a while. And I am not usually one to blog. However I just saw it in a House episode, so I thought to finally start contributing a little. House is always right. As a student could probably get some Vicodin on the go as well. But that didn't serve very well for Foreman and Taub. Well actually it wasn't bad. I digress. Hello.

I am Curious Bob, I currently have a beard. It has been my recent project. People have started doing this "No shave November" thing (also known as "movember" but seriously, what the hell is a "mo". No one is like "duuude, that Tom Selleck has a haaappnin mo' on the go maaaan".

Seriously, the world needs mo' of that mo'

But yeah, I've dabbled in this "No Shave November" thing. But as I'm usually rocking some badass facial hair usually, I decided to "warm up" with the max beard growth that I usually allow at the START. This way I can generate a beard that they will gather around campfires and tell stories about. A beard that is the portal to it's own dimension, and contains the he meaning of life, the dead sea scrolls, the name of the dude who orignally made stone henge, the perfect ratio of nachos: cheese: Jalapenos and probably a few crumbs of food due to my eating every 2 mins.

12 days in, my look can currently be summarised as:

+

Which is fun

Studyin, not so much. But by the end of the month, I shall debate in class on evolution with my darwin-esque beard, and all will listen. The beard is what get everyone trusting Darwin anyway. Srsly.

I will in fact have Darwins face, and Einsteins hairdo.

Gotta dress nice or they'll think I'm homeless.

Again, what Darwin did. Probably.

Darwin was probably homeless, that's why he played with birds

Einstein just had chicks. GIGGIDY!

Also, speaking of Darwin:

http://www.harkavagrant.com/index.php?id=287

Alas, I shall end this post, saying support "Movember" (just not the word "mo")

http://uk.movember.com/

don't mess with Abe Lincoln

And have fun!

Till Next time kids.

*Obligatory bad ass picture*

Procrastination is a good thing, right?

Ok, so I should be doing homework, but Calrissian has been nagging me to do a post. I dunno how good this is going to be, but I'm just going to keep writing and hope it doesn't break.

I've seen Scott Pilgrim vs The World twice. I believe it to be the greatest movie ever made. It has had a profound effect on everyone I've seen it with. My brother's all like "HOW ANYONE TOP THAT. IN LIFE." So yeah. It's a pretty big deal in our family. I need a sword and some powerups.

I'm going to Ecuador. YAY. More on that another time.

I'm currently hugging my 1-up mushroom. I can't stop. Seriously. I can't. It's just SO. DAMN. HUGGABLE. Screw Charmin (or Cushion or whatever they're calling it now). THIS IS THE SH*T. No, wait. Scott Pilgrim is the sh*t. This thing is just awesome. It looks like this, but cuddlier and more real like:http://www.creativeuncut.com/gallery-04/art/nsmb-mushroom-1up.jpg

(OK, I've realised that some people probably can't see the image. Try googling it if you don't know what the hell I'm talking about)

I would have a story for you but my life has been relatively quiet. I'll end this post with a joke I heard from my random Greek friend in a welsh accent:

A boy from a small village comes back after going to university. He meets his old friend and they have a conversation that goes like this:

"I haven't seen you in a while! Where have you been?" Says the friend

"Oh, I've been at University. Studying logic."

"Oh really? What's this logic thing?"

"Let me put it this way; Do you have a fish?"

"yes, I have a fish"

"If you have a fish, then you must have a bowl to put the fish in."

"I have that!"

"And if you have a bowl, you must have a table to put it on."

"I have that too!"

"If you have a table, you must have a house to put the table in."

"You're right!"

"and if you have a house, you must have a wife"

"I have a wife"

"and if you have a wife, then you're not a w*nker."

"I'm not a w*nker! Amazing!"

"I know right?"

So after saying bye to his friend, he goes to the local pub, where he meets another resident of the town.

"Hey! I haven't seen you in a while."

"Oh, I've been at University. Studying logic."

"Oh really? What's this logic thing?"

"Let me put it this way; Do you have a fish?"

"No"

"then you're a w*nker"

THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT!

Can you, like, go away please? It's summer. I'm trying to jam.

As you know, if you've read my first post, my Dad is in a Jazz band and they play in a pub on Tuesdays. Well, once when me and my brother went to see him play I freaked out a bit when Dad went to the bar to get us some lemonade. I grabbed Afronaut and ran behind a pillar-thing (I don't really know if it was a pillar, but I ran behind it.)
 Me: Alex... Is that Mr. Constantino behind the bar??

Afronaut: -Looks around pillar- Huh. Looks like it.

Me: WHY IS HE HERE?!?!

Afronaut: I don't know... Are you sure it's him?

Me: YES!! YES IT IS HIM!!

Afronaut: Are you sure it's not just a guy who looks like him?

Me: IT LOOKS JUST LIKE HIM!! You do know Mr. Constantino, right?

Afronaut: Yes, I know Mr. Constantino.

Me: THEN WHY CAN'T YOU SEE??!!

Afronaut: You're really distressed about this, aren't you?

Me: It's my holiday... It's just... I don't like seeing teachers... or being in the same building as them in my holidays...

The original story I was going to tell was basically about that night. I felt weird, I acted weird and then Dad threatened to send me home. I can no longer remember what was so interesting about that story. Oh yeah... Turns out Mr Constantino owned the pub. That sucked.... But I have a another story!! (YAAY!!)

Basicly, all that happened a week ago. This new story happened only a few days ago, on Tuesday. We had gone to see the band again. (This time joined by my good ol' friend Jessica.)

Alex had gone to the toilet and when he came back he said "Mrs. Collier and Mr. Watts are at a table by the toilets."

And for some reason my immediate reaction was to drop to the floor and freaking out. I really need to stop being a freak in public. Or at least stop drawing attention to myself...

Anywho... So after that, I remembered that I really needed a wee. I also remembered that the girl's toilet was slightly further down, and there is a table right outside it.

So naturally, I went to the toilets, dragging Jessica with me. But Mrs. Collier is my Assistant Head of House at school and used to be my form tutor. So there was no way of getting past without her recognizing both of us and saying "Hello". Especially when their table is directly outside the toilets.

Also it wasn't just them two. It was a whole bunch of teachers from our school. I'm sure it wouldn't have been as awkward if we were old enough to drink and if we weren't in a pub past 9 o'clock at night..

So after relieving myself, phoning our friend Natasha and trying not to freak out about going back past the teachers, the rest of the night was just us typically messing around and taking pictures.

Afronaut was feeling hyper and somewhat rebellious, so we easily managed to persuade him to take a picture of the teachers. After a failed attempt at sneak-picture-taking he just went straight up to the teachers said "Sorry", took a picture and walked straight out of the pub. This is what we got:

 
Well done brother. Well done...

After running out of the pub we went to the Maxican chicken pizza and chicken shop. This time I took pictures:

Little Kids are F***ing Dangerous

All this week, I have been (and will be)helping with this 'Holiday Club' for the kids at my church (because it's the almost-last week of the summer holidays) as a 'Runner'. This basically consists me moving loads of tables, buying a crap ton of stuff from Tesco and making sure the little kids don't impale themselves on the nearest pointy object. That last one is REALLY HARD. Considering there are only four of us, and two of them are really quite incompetent (one in a 'I-lack-common-sense-but-I'll-do-what-I'm-told' kind of way, the other in a 'HERP-HERP-DERP-DERPY-DERP' kind of way) it can get quite difficult to stay sane.

Even though I'm writing this six hours afterward, I still feel absolutely exhausted.
So yeah, today I had to watch the kids while they played outside. A group of seven year olds started pretending they were pirates and claimed all of the tennis racquets, skipping ropes, hula hoops and everything else as 'treasure'. For some reason, probably because I'm an idiot, I decided to take one of the racquets from the 'pirate ship' (a wooden boat thing in the front garden which had 'St. Peter's boat' on the side).


Big mistake.

Within minutes I was being chased around the garden by about nine 7-year-old pirates intent on getting their treasure back. Even after giving them back the bloody thing, they tried imprisoning me in the large basket they put the toys in, with limited success (I spent about five minutes running around with a basket around the upper part of my body pinning my arms to my sides, feeling like a idiot. When they started calming down (or so I thought) they started saying weird things like
"we're gonna steal your hair".
At that moment I said the worst thing I possibly could to a bunch of kids hyped up on nothing but air and cheese sandwiches:
"I'd like to see you try"

The next half an hour or so was a complete blur. I think it was half an hour. It may have been three minutes. It's hard to tell the time when you're being chased by crazed children bent on ripping the afro straight from my mixed-raced scalp. I'm pretty sure one of them was attached to my 'fro for about 30 seconds straight. And I vaguely remember climbing onto a decorative rock to get away but was pulled down by the horde of rabid creatures intent on adding my scalp to their ever growing pile of 'treasure'.

It was only once one of them tried jumping on me from the top of a broken fountain that anyone thought to call them off my tail. By then it had started raining, so they all went inside. Several of them told me "You're lucky your hair didn't get stoleded" rather menacingly. They're probably right.

I clearly have no idea how to deal with children. It was almost as bad as all those times that four year old tried punching me in the nuts every time he saw me. But that's a story for another day.

*Rocks back and forth* It's EVERYWHERE.... But it's just so PRETTY... But..... Oh Crap....

Sup, people. Calrissian again.

I had my best friend coming around for a sleepover last Sunday, so mum said "Tidy your bedroom. Hoover it, and hoover under the bed." So I had my day planned. Wake up, go to church, come home, tidy up, pick up my friend.

Sorted, right? Simple? I wish.

This is a diagram of my bedroom: 

And believe me there is way more crap on the floor/table/bed/everywhere than I put on the diagram...

So, anyway... I needed to get this address for my Dad, because he needed to drop off an application form to someone's house. My address book is on my shelf of crap, so I climbed my ladder to get it. On my way back down I knocked something off the window sill. There was powder all over the place. Really, really sparkly powder. Most of the powder was all over my sister's bags and our shoes. I tried to wipe some of Sara's bags, but that just meant that more went into the air. I started panicking and was sneezing like hell. But when I looked around me it was just so pretty... It was everywhere and it was hell to clean up, but it was just so damn pretty... And it smelt like cream soda. I love cream soda. Anyway... I had to find Afronaut so he could tell me what to do.

Me: Hey... um... Alex...?

Afronaut: Yeah...?

Me: You know that Glitter-Shimmer-Body-Powder-Stuff...?

Afronaut: Yeah...?

Me: I kind of knocked it over and now it looks like Edward Cullen had diarrhoea all over my room... Just come. Let me show you.

-Shows Afronaut room-

Afronaut: Wow...

Me: I know... It's pretty, right?

Afronaut: Yeah... Your room smells nice.

Me: I know. It smells like cream soda. I think it was Ice cream sundae flavour or something like that... Hey, can you tell Dad that I'm not going to church? I kind of need to tidy all of this up...

Afronaut: Yeah, okay. When we leave for church, Take everything out of your room, whack the bags outside so you don't get even more glitter everywhere, then hoover and do the rest.

Taking my brothers advice, I waited for them to leave. I got a text from one of my friends, saying that her mum wouldn't be at home to sign the application form that my Dad was going to drop off. I told Dad, and he said that we would have to find another day to drop it off. That was when I broke down on the floor, scaring the crap out of Afronaut. I was on the floor crying and repeating "I.... didn't... even... need... the... address... I... didn't... even... need... the... ADDRESS!!!" And then i cried some more.

The address book was the reason why whenever I stepped out of my room, I left sparkling, powdery footsteps behind me. It was the reason I was on the floor like this:
 
It was all pretty distressing.

So I spent the day clearing out my room, hoovering all the bags and shoes, accidentally hoovering up a pair of knickers (I really like those knickers), saving my knickers (YAY!), singing along to my iPod and tidying everything else.


It was seriously tiring and all of my stuff still sparkles.

How I Figured Out How to Find the Meaning of Life

Hello, peoples of the internet. It's me, Afronaut. I thought that today I would show you guys exactly how my mind works.

I was in bed one day, half asleep, when I came to a sudden realization: the meaning of life was encoded within the game code for Super Smash Bros. Brawl. How did I come to that realization? I honestly have no idea. Yet for the period of my half-asleep brain fart, it made perfect sense. I even managed to rationalize my thoughts and make it easily plausible, which I promptly forgot.

After spending the rest of the morning obsessing about how the hell I managed to make sense of 'Super Smash Bros is the meaning of life!', I finally remembered. It went a little something like this:

Well, when written down, the code for super smash bros. looks like a random jumble of numbers and symbols. BUT, that random jumble of numbers and symbols COULD in fact be a code for the meaning of life.

...What's that? I have no proof that this is so? Well, how much proof do YOU have that it ISN'T? HUH?! TELL ME! It's true that I can't prove my theory. BUT since no one can prove that there ISN'T a cipher that would decode it into the meaning of life, then there MUST be. If there is a cipher that translates it into the meaning of life, then the meaning of life MUST be there. Clever, right?

If you're confused, don't worry. I'm confused as well. If you actually understood that, I like the way you think. We should be friends.

I'm done rambling now.

Like, Hai...

Greetings, Earthlings... *COUGH COUGH* Uh I mean... Hi... Yeah... Well, Me and my brother are writing a blog. Possibly to be joined by our other brother.
I don't really know how to introduce this blog so I'm just gonna give this a shot.
We're weird. Our life is weird, our family is weird and our weirdness is weird.
So that's what this blog is about. Weirdness. And life.

I'm Elandra a.k.a Calrissian. Heres me as a stick man.... Stick woman? Stick chick? Lets go with stick chick. Here's me as a stick chick:

And my brother is Alex a.k.a Afronaut. Heres his stick dude:

Pretty awesome, huh? Well I like stick chicks/dudes :D

We are from London.

Anywho, you're probably wondering about the name of our blog, well, let me tell you.
Our dad is a Jazz man. He plays with his band at this Pub on Tuesday nights. So me and Afronaut went to see him play. We were conversing about the fact that we should make a blog, when I looked out the window and saw "Tasty Chicken and Pizza" across the street.
Me: Hey, Alex?

Afronaut: What?

Me: You know most chicken shops sell pizza too?

Afronaut: Yeah...

Me: Well, who actually buys pizza from a chicken shop?

Afronaut: Huh... I don't know... That's an interesting thought. What made you think that?

Me: Chicken shop across the road.
 
Afronaut: Oh... I want a pizza now.

Me: Me too...

-song finishes, we walk up to Dad's piano-

Me & Afronaut: Daaaaaaaaaad....

Dad: Yes...

Afronaut: We're gonna go across the road and buy a pizza.

Dad: Okay...

So me and Afronaut go across the road to the chicken shop. We weren't drunk. We're too young for that crap. It was a natural high. I told you we were weird. So we were giggling, laughing, talking to the chicken shop guy and looking at pizza toppings. I was ordering the pizza, when Afronaut interrupted me. He was staring past me at the counter and he looked like he was going to explode laughing any second.
Afronaut: Elandra....

Me: what...?

Afronaut: -says nothing. Just keeps staring at toppings list on the counter-

Me: WHAT??

Chicken shop guy: Spelling mistake, huh?

Afronaut: Yeah...

The thing making my brother laugh is arse off, was in fact, the fact that the pizza toppings list started with "maxican chicken."

But we were naturally-high, so this was hilarious.
So me, Alex and Mr. Pizza man got into a hyper conversation about how american spellings are all different and how they feel the need to miss out letters like instead of writing "colour" they write "color".

Anywho, after getting our Maxican chicken and pepperoni pizza, Dad's jazz was finished, so we got in the car and went home, eating our pizza on the way.

And I just gotta say, those Maxican's sure do know their chicken....

** EDIT!! **
Robert a.k.a Curious Bob has joined our team (YAY!!)
His stick dude will be featured once I make it...